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This stunning stag, “From the Shadows” was a wonderful drawing to start 2024!
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An Enjoyable First Drawing of 2024!
This stunning stag, “From the Shadows” (ref. Pexels) started life as part of a Bonny Snowdon live draw along – 1000 artists from all over the world gathering online to draw together on New Year’s Day was a very special thing to be part of!
Not being a fan of pastelmat, I chose to draw my version on black PaintOn. It’s the first time I have used the black, but my previous experience of other colours of this paper led me to choose my Luminance pencils instead of Polychromos, as I find they work better on this surface, especially when aiming for a loose, more ‘painterly’ style as we were here. We worked with a limited palette – I used just 10 pencils (plus Pablo white for the eye highlights).
The antlers were THE MOST FUN to draw..! The combination of PaintOn and Luminance were an absolute dream for their fairly smooth texture. I struggled a little more with the fur – partly working on black changes the colours, but there’s limited layering on PaintOn to compensate, and partly it was hard for me to stay away from the tiny hair details and think loose/sketchy.
Perfectionism vs. Creativity
Which brings me to my ‘artist’s struggles part two’ post – the subject of which is Art and Perfectionism. I’ve been a perfectionist for as long as I can remember. Where’s the harm in that, you ask? And sure, it has plus points. A careful eye for detail, zero tolerance of mistakes, doing the best I can do all the time…
But art is creativity, and perfectionism massively hinders creativity, especially when you are learning new skills. Perfectionists don’t like to take risks. We lack confidence, and are usually overly critical of anything we do. My early forays into coloured pencil both got shelved for several months a piece, because they weren’t ‘going well enough’.
How could they be, I was just starting out? Yet I know many people who will identify with this, and many like me who will think they are no good, and give up, often forever. Which is really sad! I came back to my drawings – eventually – because I am also a bit bloody-minded.
But there are many other art mediums and crafts I have tried, and scattered to the winds like confetti, because I ‘wasn’t good enough’ to compete with my own self-set high standards.
Giving up isn’t the only problem – often I just plain don’t get started! When perfection is unattainable it can make getting started feel pointless.
Let It Go and Draw On…
So, I’ve had to learn to let go of perfectionism. At least a little bit! I’ll always have that hankering to be better. Positively channelled, as I am more able to do now, I don’t see that as a bad thing. I see mistakes in every drawing I do – but I’m learning not to beat myself up, because those are mistakes I learn from, and improve on next time. Will I ever be able to embrace a fast/loose, sketchy style (as this deer was meant to be…)? Possibly not.
But that is also what I have learnt. To not let perfectionism stop me from creating. To try new challenges, like this drawing on black. But most of all to accept that perfectionism will always be there, hovering in the background, guiding me in a style that is my own. I’m okay with that now. It’ll only become a problem if it stops me drawing.
PS. I struggled for a title for this one. In the end I went with something a little sentimental, as the first drawing of a new year, and in a way, as I continue to come to terms with the after-effects of my TBI, my new life.
Own “From the Shadows”
My first drawing of 2024 is available as a luxury art print.
